Sharing the Geek

I just finished listening to Episode 48 of Rachel and Miles X-Plain the X-Men and the briefly talk about how to get a significant other interested in Comic Books. That made me think about all the times I’ve tried to get my husband into the things that I’m excited about and so, I have a few tips.

1,) Talk about why you get excited about something.
This was the Rachel and Miles suggestion that got me thinking about this, and I agree. It’s important to talk about why you are excited about something, not just that it’s cool and amazing and the best thing ever. It’s also important not to make them feel like there is something wrong with them for not knowing about or liking it on the same level you do.

2.) Let them try things out in their comfort zone.
My husband doesn’t like video games, but he was willing to give World of Warcraft a try. It’s not his thing and he doesn’t enjoy it. This weekend, I’m planning on having him play Cho’Gall with me in Heroes of the Storm. It allows me to drive and him to shoot things. If he loves it, awesome! If he hates it, we’ll try something else.

3.) Be okay with them doing it because they love you.
I’m very aware that the majority of the TV that we watch is stuff that I like. My husband has definitely vetoed shows in the pass that I have to watch on my own (though how he doesn’t understand the beauty that is Colin O’Donoghue as Hook, or the epicness that is the Teen Wolf ship that is Sterek, will baffle me until the end of time). But he knows that it’s important for me to share these shows that I love with him, so he watches them. Sometimes he gets tired of them (we often struggle to get through Arrow) and other times he gets sucked in (he’s pretty into The Walking Dead). Sometimes I get frustrated when he isn’t enjoying something we’re doing together, but I have to remember he’s still willing to do it for me.

4.) Be patient.
The quickest way to scare a significant other away from the things you love is to make them feel bad about not getting it right away. If you are not someone who is patient with people learning things that they are unfamiliar with, then maybe recruit a mutual friend who will be better at introducing your significant other to the stuff you like. Getting frustrated with someone who is trying to connect with you (an expert) on something you love is going to ultimately ruin it for both of you.

5.) Do the same for them.
It’s important to make sure that you try and learn about your significant others passions as well. It’s okay to talk about what you love, but make sure that you don’t dominate all your conversations with your interests. Engage them with their interests as well. And make sure you keep in mind the first 4 tips and look at them from the opposite direction. Try not to get frustrated when you are learning about what they love and make sure you do things that they like to do, even when it’s not your thing.

These are not magic wands to make your significant other huge fans like you, but hopefully it will give you a few strategies to get them involved in the things you love.